I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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