btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
