Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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