But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
