May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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