i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize