She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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