You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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