New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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