Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
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