So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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