sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Randomize
