I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Randomize
