That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
