Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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