This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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