I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Welp...herpes.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Randomize
