they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Randomize
