bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize