Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize