Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize