Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Randomize
