We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
We had to coat check the pizza.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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