yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
We have started to decorate penises.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
We're not piercing ourselves today.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
