Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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