I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
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