we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
