I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
