STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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