I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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