whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
