Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
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