It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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