you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
