Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Soap is not a condiment
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
