It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
she pinky promised me she was 18
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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