ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
