if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
My hand turned me down
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
