I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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