Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
