i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I just gargled with NyQuil
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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