I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
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