How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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