Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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