Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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