Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Text me some of your sweat
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Come on in and take your pants off
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