You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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