week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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