successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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