So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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