is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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