I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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